Intro

As I gaze outside the obnoxiously large window in my parents house this afternoon, I realize exactly why I have half-jokingly called myself the indoorsman. Snow blowing sideways in the foreground of a sky that is as grey as my new peacoat, it looks like hell. That is if hell was full of snow and dick-shrinking winds instead of its popular preconceived notion that it is made of fire and occupied by lawyers. I would, at this point, rather stay inside and eat my father's colon stretching cereals with expired goat milk than go outside. And i may be looking into this too much, but perhaps there is more to my current mindset than what appears on the surface. Staying inside by the fire and never too far away from my iTelephone or PS3 seems pretty easy, definitely the easier choice of the two. Going outside presents challenge, adversity, uncomfortability. As of late, I have been choosing to stay inside a lot more than go outside to the uncomfortable aspects of life. Most of my life represents safety. And also stupidity. I would say 70% safety, 40% stupidity. I know at some point I need to man up and go outside, yet currently I do not want my tiny balls to need to curl up closer to my body for warmth, I like where they hang now.

Biology.

I am the most unselfishly selfish person I know. Qu'est-ce que fuck would be a common response to this, but listen. I do selfish things such as waste my parents money and cause them nothing but stress, however in the process i am also hurting myself and hindering my potential for a successful future. Make sense? I don't think so either. So what now? Asking myself this question is like asking Stevie Wonder directions to the nearest optomotrist, it's just not happening right now. The only thing I have going for me is that my life isnt quite as bad as my analogies, but hey I'm only 20. A sneak peek into the mind of the indoorsman is probably a waste of time and boring to most people, but at this point I'm done giving a Stajan about most people.

There are two doors that lead outside right now, both within ten feet. It would be a simple task to leave the house, however I am the Indoorsman, and doing so would mean changing who I am. Fear and uncertainty stand in the way of possible production and meaning. To strange eyes this may seem silly, but it is, as they as, what it is. Every minute working towards, or against, taking a step outside.

I may be random, edgy, dumb, smart, funny or disgusting. Perhaps all at the same time. I'm obviously still trying to figure it out myself, and it would be an honour to have you follow what will be the most anti-climactic experience of your life.